Please sleep, my darling, sleep...

So...

I'm sitting here next to a playlist that will be played during a slideshow just following my cousin's memorial mass. At the young age of 22, my cousin has passed. A frigid reminder of the fragility of life.
I was woken up that day by my uncle practically in tears saying there was an accident, of course it could have been anyone, but my fit, young, and optimistic cousin? I would have never guessed. Seems he was lifting weights by himself and something went awry, then barbel ended up crushing his chest then rolling to his neck to cut off his air supply. My family remained optimistic, but being me I had already expected the worst. A few days later, maybe a week it came; my cousin had passed. Darkness swept into my house and I could imagine how my cousin's family must have felt, to have lost their youngest. I mean, apparently, a parent's ultimate fear is for their kid to go before them, but I assume losing the youngest has a little extra sting to it.

I went out for a walk with Mark anyway, I didn't want to stay in my house. For about a block I fought not to cry, but the conversation saved me from that. Which was good.

A few days later was my family reunion, it was smaller this year. Apparently, my uncle wasn't planning on coming anyway nor was my cousin but it seems weird that he couldn't. My cousin lived in yellow stone and I only saw him rarely so it almost seems unreal that he is dead. The last time I saw him was around Christmas '07, I think. I remember I had just come back from a basketball game and he was at my house reading a book. He was sort of quiet around the family so we didn't talk alot, I would have never thought that this good bye, if there was one, knowing me I was probably asleep, would be the last.

So, everyone. Appreciate life. It is way more fragile than it seems and apparently we young people are not invincible. Who knew? Certainly not this writer. The other thing is, appreciate your friends and family, you don't actually know how much time you have with them. Now that my cousin is gone, I wish I would have been able to talk to him more. I mean, I knew him and we got along, but we still didn't talk much. I never just thought to myself "I wonder how Cory is right now." Even with the internet, we barely talked later in his life, we got along really well when we were kids. He was so funny, I remember just waiting for anytime they could visit from Illinois. He was about as funny as they come.

So near the end of this month will be his memorial mass here in Euclid and back in Yellowstone National Park, his ashes will be spread from the top of a mountain. His brother says that what he had wanted. We over here don't exactly know how to feel about that, but we aren't going to question it.

But anyhow, life is short and fragile. We as users of life must appreciate it more than we do, live each day as our last because you literally never know. I'm sure my invincible 22 year old cousin never thought we would have any trouble even without a spotter.

Live.laugh.love
It's totally gay and corny, but at the same time true. Life is a gift we must appreciate while its still ours to have.